Ok, this one is kinda long, but bear with me.

by admin on March 16, 2015

Every year, Farmer Big won the blue ribbon for the largest hog at the county fair. His neighbor, Farmer Little came over one day with a bottle of his best elderberry wine and proceeded to get Farmer Big drunk. Having achieved his aim, Farmer Little starts questioning Farmer Big about his trick for the biggest hog. Turns out, every year, 2 weeks before the fair, Farmer Big would select his largest hog and cram a #3 thermos cork up the hogs ass to plug him up. So Farmer Little decided 4 weeks ahead of the fair to cram a #6 thermos cork up his largest hog’s ass. Sho’ nuff, that year Farmer Little’s hog one the Blue Ribbon for the first time ever. As luck would have it, just as the judges were awarding the blue ribbon, the organ grinder came walking by with his monkey. The monkey looked up at the hog’s ass from his perspective and saw the cork. Being a curious creature, the monkey reached up and pulled out the cork. Needless to say, shit flew everywhere as the pig flew around the room like a balloon when a kid lets go of it. Farmer Big starts laughing uproariously as the judges unaward the blue ribbon. A crestfallen Farmer Little says "it ain’t that funny”. “Wanna bet?”, Farmer Big says, “You should have seen the look on that monkey’s face as he was trying to put the cork back in!”

submitted by olddave62
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