The media is abuzz with the news that Fred Phelps, pastor of the Westboro Baptist Church, is apparently at death's door. Before he shuffles off this mortal coil, it would be nice to get a few things cleared up.
First, it's recently come out that to be a member of the WBC, you have to be dyslexic. This makes a lot of sense – turns out that all along they've been trying to tell us that "God hates gafs". That's all – He just doesn't want us to make any mistakes.
At the same time, they continue to condemn dyslexic devil worshippers, whom they teach us have sold their souls to Santa!
submitted by EngineerBill
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